Happy Holidays
We are in full swing for the Holiday Season and for a lot of
us it is an exciting time full of thoughts of love and families coming together
and fabulous home made meals where everyone gathers around the table and sings “Kum-by-ya”.
But for some of us, it can be a time of sadness, anxiety,
depression, full of regrets and darkness. For me, I have my nice little family
that includes myself, Brett, Zack and Haleigh but when you start expanding
outside of that, there is a lot of brokenness in relationships: divorce,
relational-distance, banishment…relationships that are way off the mark from
God’s intention.
Holidays Highlight my
Brokenness
I am from a Christian family, but it is and has always been
a broken family from its very foundation. Because of divorce when I was three, my family of origin consists of my
mother, my older sister, my younger brother, and myself. It has been over 13
years that the four of us have been together to celebrate the Holiday’s as a
family. I have not spoken to my sister in over a year and a half and it has been
several years since my siblings and I have even bothered to pick up a phone or
send a card to each other for the Holidays.
The Challenge
As a team, my coworker's and I from LA County FCA read the book Draw the Circle. A very high level summary
of the book is a 40-day challenge to circle our prayers – to kneel down with
our prayers and draw a circle around our prayers and ourselves. A challenge to persistently
and consistently lift those prayers up to the Lord until He answers it with a
yes or no.
With the Holidays approaching one of my coworkers asked me
if I was going home to visit family and I said NO, with what I can only image
could be described as a look and tone of distaste and irritation. He challenged
me if I had drawn a circle around it. My immediate response was “well yeah,
I’ve been praying about this for YEARS!”
So that was that, at least so I thought. But three days later,
after church I was reading my Draw the
Circle devotion for the day and the Lord impressed on my heart that I
should invite my mom to circle our family in prayer for 40 days. The idea was a
like a sudden brainstorm that excited me and seemed to have such a promise of
hope wrapped up in it during such an anticipated time of Holiday Hopelessness.
So I immediately called my mom to tell her my idea. I invited her to
specifically, with me for the next 40 days, to draw a circle around our family
of four. I committed to calling her or emailing her every day for the next 40
days to let her know that I had prayed for our family.
Unexpected Benefit of a Holy Spirit Brainstorm
What you need to understand first and foremost is that my
mom is 83 years old. She lives alone in a different state than my siblings and
myself. She has experienced the same broken relationships with my brother and
sister. It has been years since she has seen my sister. She has been alone since my father and her
divorced 40 years ago. She can go for days, to weeks, to sometimes even entire
months without hearing from me, my sister or my brother. She can go days to
weeks, from not hearing from anyone.
For her to not only send but to actually receive daily emails
or a phone call from one of her children was a hope like living water itself.
Pray Different
During the 40-day devotions with my mom one afternoon I
happened to be home alone when I felt the need to go pray. I began to pray my
standard prayer for my family that I have prayed for years – I asked the Lord
for reconciliation and I cried out for restoration. As I voiced my desires, I
felt this gentle wave of truth wash over my heart. It was as though Jesus
himself was knelling down behind me, with his hand rested on my back, and I
heard Him whisper to my heart, There is
nothing in that relationship to restore. It is broken. It has been broken from
the very beginning. Today is a NEW day! And the plans I have for you are NEW,
not based on the old.
Speak God’s Word
The next day, as I was reading again all of a sudden it
clicked for me. The book tells us to circle the promises that the Lord has for us in His word. Not the promises you
dream up for yourself. So I began a Google search for Bible verses about broken
relationships. What does the Lord have to say about brokenness in His word,
what are His promises in the Bible? My search resulted in a list of about 15
different topical verses. So one by one, I began to read God’s word out loud. What
I have found to be true for myself, is when I speak God’s word out loud my
spirit within me will give testimony to the truth - for God’s truth He has
specifically for me. I will have a physical reaction- tears will appear from
nowhere, or I will have an accelerated heart rate.
This is God’s truth, His promise, He Spoke to me on this
day:
The Valley of Dry Bones (Ezekiel
37: 1-6 (NIV)
“The hand of the Lord was on me,
and he brought me out by the Spirit of the Lord and set me in the middle of a
valley; it was full of bones. He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a
great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. He asked
me, “Son of man, can these bones live?” I said, “Sovereign Lord, you alone
know.” Then he said to me, “Prophesy to these bones and say to them, ‘Dry
bones, hear the word of the Lord! This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these
bones: I will make breath enter you, and
you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon
you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to
life. Then you will know that I am the Lord.’”
Peace in the Promise
I don’t have a resolution for God’s promise He gave me, but I’ll
tell you what I do have: faith! Never before have I had such a deep peace about
my family. It is actually quite something to have peace within brokenness. This
prayer I am praying – claiming, are not my words, but the Lords. His words do
not return void. His word is true. His word is eternal. Maybe He will work this
out in my lifetime, perhaps He will work it out in my children’s lifetime, but regardless
of timing, my testimony today, is that I have peace in His promise and I have
faith in the Lord!
Prayer
Dear
Lord, you are so good! Thank you for loving me so much that you have had
relentless patience with me! Thank you for your gentle promptings and your
tenderness in opening my heart and mind to receive your truth. You riches are
laid out like a treasure map for us, clearly marking your way for us to receive
everything you have planned for us. Your timing is yours alone to know. Forgive
me for being stubborn and blind in my own ways and prayers. Forgive me for not
believing you are capable of amazing things like bringing life to a valley of
dried bones! I trust you, and your timing. I love you.
Lessons from My Heart
to Yours
11. Listen, have an open mind and open heart to
listen to our brothers and sisters in Christ when they speak the truth and have
a voice of accountability to share with us.
22. Make room for quiet moments with the Lord so you
can hear Him speak to you. And when He speaks, trust Him and take action in faith
that it is His voice.
33. Pray & mix it up! When we get into our
day-to-day routines and ruts of prayer we marginalize God’s power to act in our
life. Pray a new prayer, in a new place and in a new way!
44. Search the Lords word and read His word out
loud! Search out His truth He has for you by discovering His promises He has in
the Bible.
55. Claim His promise. Circle His promise.
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