Not Me

I have become so thin

because there is no more room

in the room of me

for me.

In the shower

the hot water washes over me.

The steam loosens me

and I discover an edge…

On the inside

and lift

            and pry

                        to see.

What is this edge?

What is under this edge?

On the paper-thin

            thinness of me.

I see light.

I sense freedom.

I mercilously pull

            with one tearing rip

desparate to see.

What I discover

...a dark shadow of an unheard child

that lives deep inside of me.

It fills me up

and crowds my space

and tries to become me.

It has deceived me for so long.

Has become me so well.

That I didn’t even know

and I couldn’t even see.

That’s why I am so thin

because there was no more room

in the crowded room of me.

With much curiosity and wonder

I gaze at this thing before me and speak.

“You have lived in here for SO long

            and my you are SO big!

I had no idea

that you were within me!”

There was no response this time.

Just a silent

shocked stare.

Because now discovered

            out in the open

                        naked

                                    face to face with me...

It realized it no longer had power.

            No voice.

That I had finally been set free.

So I just smiled

            and extended my hand

and boldly spoke my new truth…

“It’s so nice to meet you.

            What a relief to know you.

                        I have just this moment discovered that

            You

                        are NOT

                                    Me!